Every time I talk to my father, it feels like I have to keep reminding him of the rule of tough love. For those of you that don't know what tough love is, here's my definition: Not doing something for someone you love if your actions only enable them to not change a bad behavior. The situation that has financially hurt my father over the years is not being able to say no to my siblings when they ask for something (eg: money for laundry, to go out to the movies, etc, another car after they have totaled 2 previous ones bought for them).
My father was told last week that due to rheumatoid arthritis, he will need to have his legs amputated if he doesn't move to a warm/dry environment (eg: Arizona). His legs are worse off than a 90 year old's legs, yet he is just a bit over 50 (with 2 knee replacements under his belt). He needs special socks and shoes that would help and cost $200, but because he has been giving my siblings money (they are 19 & 22, living with him), he does not have the money to do it. Their problems have also been taking his free time, so he hasn't scheduled a follow-up visit for additional testing as well.